It felt good to run, I was keeping a good steady pace, and it didn't seem that I was too winded. The air was fresh and soft on my face as I trotted along the trail. The dirt trail was in a wooded area and it circled around for about three miles. There were some people on the trail besides myself and my friend, and everyone seemed in a chipper mood. They all seemed to nod and smile as we passed them on the trail. As I ran I felt happy too, I also had some good conversations with God and my friend who was with me. I wondered if these people were happy because they ran on a regular basis too. Out of the blue, I was startled. My heart began to pound, and the next thing I knew I was opening my eyes too see the ceiling in my bedroom. I realized that I had been startled by our neighbors pounding on the wall next door. I lay there for awhile, breathing, and waiting till my heart stopped pounding so fast. Well it figured, me running, that never happens. I could feel my arm start to tingle, as it regained feeling from sleeping on it. Running, sometimes I feel it could be a good thing to do, other times I despise the thought. I have dreamt about running quite a bit lately. I wonder if I should try it.
How had I come to believe, that the deep things of my heart and mind were not important? Who told me they didn’t care about the things I was feeling or thinking about? The truth of the matter was, that no one actually said I don’t care about what you think or feel, they just never bothered to ask. Never being asked is another way to let someone know that they are not valued. In response to some of the most important people in my life not bothering to pursue my young heart and mind, I believed I had nothing to offer or give that would be of any value to anyone else. I believed I was stupid. I heard it over and over in my heart and head with out a second of doubt of its truth. Not until my twenty sixth year did the truth that I believed about myself reveal it’s self as a lie. There were six of us who met each week, five younger women and our leader, a woman the five of us had approached to ask if she would be willing to let us learn from her and be mentored and guided ...
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