The Color Green

My grandfather's family is from Mexico, but Alejo married a greengo. Despite this,my great grandmother passed on her Mexican recipes to her son and daughter in law and my grandmother took great care to learn well those recipes, she made them every week for her family of 9.  I grew up eating Mexican style beans.  The best was when Mom or grandma cooked Mexican style beans.  You would step foot into the house on those days and the most wonderful smells would full your nose.  Mexican spices are some of my favorets.   One pound bag of Pinto Beans. Pour them out on the counter or table sort them to make sure there aren't any stones. Swipe them into a kettle fill kettle with water couple inches above beans. Let beans sock over night in water or 8 hours. Dump socked beans in strainer rinse than back to kettle. On the stove it goes water inch over the beans. Add table spoon chili powder two table spoons ground cumin you may want more or less, your taste. Chopped onion, one. Table spoon

Why do we go through life dreaming dreaming and in most cases never act on those dreams?  There are those who put dreams into action, they seem fearless to me.  I know that isn't true though, for they are not without fear.  We all of us in part fear failure, we fear that if those dreams become a reality they may not be what we expected them to be or, we won't feel about them what we thought we would.  Often times we decide to stop trying to put dreams in to action, because we have been burned by expectations of things we should feel after those dreams come to be. At some point we just stop dreaming, with that comes losing hope.  Why is that?  Dreaming and hoping for the future, for the Possability of something better or different.  The older I get the harder it is to hold on to dreams, and to hope for better.  I wonder often if this is it, if this is all life is supposed to be? Despite wondering this more often, I still have this sense that ,this isn't it.  That this life i